It seems that suffering a miscarriage creates an opportunity
for people to voice their opinions on your lifestyle. If they don’t agree with
you, then they think it is okay for them to tell you why you miscarried.
I, unfortunately, have experienced this first hand and from
people in my own family. While I know they don’t agree with us leaving our
family size in God’s hands, I never imagined they would use the death of our babies
to attack us. Of course, maybe I just feel attacked because my emotions are so
raw, but in either case (intentional or not), I really don’t think it was the
best course of action.
I had an email response all set to go, however, my husband
wasn’t quite in agreement with some of the wording. I reworded the section that
caused him concern, but he still wasn’t sure. The next morning as I was reading
my Bible, God led me to Matthew 27:11-14.
Now Jesus stood before
the governor. And the governor asked Him, saying, “Are You the King of the
Jews?”
Jesus said to him, “It
is as you say.”
And while He was being
accused by the chief priests and elders, He answered nothing.
Then Pilate said to
Him, “Do You not hear how many things they testify against You?” But He
answered him not one word so that the governor marveled greatly.
Christ said nothing to His accusers. It didn’t matter what
they said. The fact that they were saying it didn’t change the truth. Besides,
He didn’t want to change the course of events because that would have been
against the Father’s will.
We are here to do the Father’s will just as Christ was. It
was after reading this that I remembered Exodus 14:14,
“The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace.”
I need to hold my peace. I sent an email that instead
answered their concern about my health and left it at that.
That being said, I am pretty sure that none of the people
who sent their “concerns” reads my blog. If they do, then they will be able to
read what I wanted to respond. I want to share here how I initially felt about
responding because I not only want to express our views, but also educate
others who may not know so they don’t make the same mistake if someone in their
life has a miscarriage.
Check back tomorrow to see my initial response.
i'm so sorry you have to endure such things...especially from family.
ReplyDeletei remember back when i miscarried, and the nasty things people told me.
i wasn't saved, i wasn't married, i was in a toxic relationship. you can just imagine the insults, rude remarks, and 'you should be glad's' that i heard.
just awful. some people can be so insensitive. you were right not to answer.
get your peace from God and let God do the rest. hugs to you!
Oh Darcy, how awful. I'm so sorry that people have been so thoughtless. I am assuming that those who wrote such terrible things do not belong to our life-giving Holy father, and am praying for them as such.
ReplyDeleteDarcy, its awesome to see that through this tragedy God is growing and stretching you to make you more like Jesus. Praise Him that you went to His Word and to your husband before reacting. God knew what he was doing when he gave us men as an authority. We can't always trust our emotions and although your feelings and hurts are valid as you said, nothing you can say or do will make others see their insensitivities. Extending forgiveness is hard but it brings a freedom beyond compare. Praying that you are able to revel in the joy of the mission God has given you. That the smile on your face and the joy in your heart will be your greatest testimony as a mom who is walking the path God has chosen for you. I love you!
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