Saturday, January 28, 2012

Learning Joy in the Middle of the Night


Last night was not a good night for my youngest. Not only is she dealing with teething and a virus which causes congestion, but we are staying at a friend’s home so bedtime routine was different, she slept in a different crib, and all of us were in the same room. She was up multiple times and most of the time that she did sleep, it was only because I was holding her. I think I got a total of 3 ½ hours of sleep.

At around 2:45 a.m. I was talking with God about the situation. I was exhausted and I was afraid of her waking everyone else in the house. I was blunt with God and told Him that I was trying to find contentment in the current situation, but I was having a hard time doing so. How stupid I was. He immediately reminded me of my friend who miscarried last week, of my friend who may have been miscarrying as I was whining, of my many friends who have experienced miscarriages before, of mothers who have empty arms due to still births, giving their children up for adoption, or heaven forbid, kidnapping. I was instantly humbled.

I began praising God that I had Tissa in my arms, that I was well enough to be able to hold her, comfort her, and pace the room with her. I thanked Him for herbs to ease her teething pain and clear congestion. I praised Him for the fact that the other girls didn’t wake up.

I also took the time to pray for my friends. I prayed for comfort for my friend who miscarried last week. I prayed for peace about His plans for my friend who is worried that she might be in the process of her fourth miscarriage. I prayed for my friends who have experienced miscarriage and/or still births before. I prayed not only for those mothers whose hearts may ached because they gave their children up for adoption, but also for those children that they may find homes where they would have a mother to love them, hold them, comfort them, and pace the room in the middle of the night with them.

I’m still on my journey of learning contentment and joy, but I am so glad I am not on this journey alone. The Lord is constantly by my side and as I learn to praise Him in all things, it becomes easier and I pray eventually it because a way of life. It is amazing how much I am learning about myself since committing to this journey. The Lord is truly opening my eyes to a number of aspects of my life that need changing and those changes are coming easier and easier as I become a more joyful, Christ-filled woman.

I encourage all of you to start on a journey to contentment and joy if you haven’t already started. I highly recommend One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp to get you started on that journey. Making your own list of one thousand gifts is humbling as well. I have shared some of the things on my list before, but I’ll share some more with you because it is always uplifting to me to hear/see others praising God for what He is doing in their lives.

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